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Sunday, April 16, 2017

Talaaq- An unresolved ssue, causing more harm to the women & family

In the best interest of a woman
Who may be my mother, my sister, my wife or my daughter! 
[Note: the issue must be solved with human right angle and dignity of a woman, which the Holy Quran dose not deny]

The first time I came in the contact with this word (Talaaq) was in 1989, when I was a student of AMU, Aligarh. I joined JNU, New Delhi in 1990 and for many years I was not confronted with this word so seriously.  Though it  kept comingto my mind in different forms and in varied contexts.

Of late I have started thinking about it a bit more seriously and more rationally.  My outlookof  viewing  it has also been changed now. I think I have evolved from a little child (son) to a brother, to a husband and to a father. Now I have different angles to look at this issue. I sincerely thank Allah (the most gracious, the most merciful and the only owner of the Day of Judgment) for saving me from this curse- the curse of talaaq. But this is just one person who is blessed with immense love and respect of his parents, siblings, wife and children.  May Allah keep showering these blessings! Amin!. However the world is not like this. All is not well. Many of us are not so blessed.  

I am sharing my thoughts about the Triple Talaaq issue with these backgrounds.  Before writing,  I attempted to explore my little world- contacted people in my village, tried to get information from relatives, friends and colleagues to understand the issue- how grave isit after all?

The cases of Triple Talaaq are not many. I have come across only one case related to Halala and not a single case of Khula. But my world is very smallI thereforeexplored the internet and used the search engine called Google to expand my knowledge on the subject.
I am personally not in favour of quick divorce. It not just affects the lives of wife and husband but also impacts the lives of children of these couples who face problems throughout their  lives in one way or the other .  I belong to the old school of thought where one  finds ways to settle the marital problems at home for the sake of beautiful life of his beautiful children.  Now don’t ask me about the ones who don’t have. children In this condition/ circumstance, the interest of a woman is supreme.

Each woman counts. Even if it affects one person, we must address it.  Let us begin  by acknowledging the fact that:
·         Triple Talaaq is in practice
·         Halala is in practice-  I have come across with one case
·         Women have a right to khula but it is not in practice- I have not found a single woman who wanted khula and got it.   

No one is perfect and everyone has  some shortcoming or incompatibility issue. Which is why I would like to  reiterate that both the people  and their families must work hard to find out the real issue and address it immediately . But in case the only option left with the couple is that of Talaaq (divorce) I would like to see a system (the system applicable for all the followers of Islam) which keeps a women’s interest supreme as she suffers massively . Of course I am not denying the fact those men also suffer. 


[Note: This article is in progress. Shaheen,  16/04/2017]

6 comments:

Arshad said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Arshad said...

Hi All,

Triple Talaq is not allowed in a single go in Islam.
It has to happen over time.
Please have a look on this article.

http://www.islamawareness.net/Talaq/talaq_book.html

If the rules laid in Quran are followed, the cases of talaq will even reduce and no woman would be ever denied her rights.
Most of us don't know what are the rules and resort to what is being propagated by people, who themselves are not aware about the procedures.

Please spread the awareness about it. We are fighting for something that even Quran doesn't allow.

Regards

Education said...

Thank you Arshad sb. I will read it.

Arshad said...

Dear Shaheen

Thanks for your time.
The article is really good and I wish everyone reads it.
Just a few points i missed before.

1. Triple Talaq is in practice for sure. We need to tell people the correct procedure.
2. Halala is a disputed practice. Let me clarify.,,
A couple can divorce one, and they can remarry again - No Halala required
The same couple divorces again (2nd time) they can remarry again - No Halala Required
The same couple when divorces 3rd time, in this case Halala may be required.

The divorce process itself gives approx ~3 months time for the couple to settle their anger, grudges, intervention and pacification by their families. In this period the husband has to take care of his wife. if they have kids, Husband has to bear the responsibility.

Therefore, Halala is not required until the divorce takes place 3rd time to the same couple.

I have tried to write what i knew was true. Please feel free to correct me if you find me swaying from the rules.

Education said...

Dear Arshad Sb.

Thank you very much for the nice words about the posting.

This was just a I thought which I jotted down and posted here.
I will include your comments and suggestion at the time of finalization of this article.
Then I will post it at any public forum.

May I have your email address?
I moderate an online group called Arkitect India (https://groups.yahoo.com/neo/groups/arkitectindia/info)

I would like you to write your opinion there also.

With warm regards,
Shaheen

Education said...

For reference:
Census puts Muslim divorce rate at 0.56% as compared to 0.76% among Hindus.